The Diagnosis.

With Thomas being so young I have been asked on way too many occasions by other ASD parents how did I get a diagnosis so young? Some are in disbelief, some have a tinge of jealousy, others assume that I pushed for it. In fact it was none of those.

For a good 12-18 months we knew Thomas was no ordinary boy. Even though I was continually told he was just a boy. Like boys are meant to be rough and tumble and belt up their parents. No one was taking me seriously. I could not discipline him, nothing worked long term. EVER. Shopping was a nightmare. Church going stopped as he was upsetting the parishioners. Not purposefully but just becuase he was Thomas, loud, vibrant, and could not sit for more than 30 minuets and would physically attack us.

Early in 2010 I approached the centre director of the day care centre to get his behaviours monitored closely. When I was able to get a response, I was told he was smart, not a bother and played often on his own. Which was the case every time I picked him up. He would often be in the dirt or sand pit playing happily.

But unlike other children walking to the car was difficult, there were tantrums, he would run off, refuse point blank to hold my hand. And don't even bother asking how his day was. Driving home I would often get screamed at in a defiant way, almost like he did not want to leave. Yet the staff did not see this. They rarely saw the horrible side or as what is now referred to as a meltdown. I put the daily meltdowns as being part of the witching hour that supposedly all babies and children go through. The stage of the day where they are just tired and over it.

I often found Thursdays the worst day of the week. Still have not worked that answer out yet. But that was the day he was at the naughtiest, the most defiant and difficult to do anything with. So at the end of 2010 when there were just too many staffing issues and safety issues at the centre for my liking I pulled him out.

I then interviewed and found one awesome day care mum, sure she was even further away from us. But she seemed to have her head screwed on. He would through the day be just one of four at the most. I also mentioned I had some concerns over his behaviour.

With in weeks she was telling me about what she was observing with his quirks. He has a tile in her room that he must be able to see and be able to sit on. Or he gets distressed or pushes what ever or whoever is on it off it. The way he had to play with certain toys. The list goes on. She was awesome at seeing that it was just not my imagination that there was something different about him.

In early may there was a workshop for the carers and parents were invited on sensory processing issues. My day care mum basically told me I HAD to go. I'm almost certain if I used the no one to look after him excuse she would have told me to bring him over to her.

I asked one question/statement at the beginning of the session as light bulbs were going off in my head. I was told I was calling them the next morning to get help. Yep ok so we do have issues.
When I called the wait was huge. Not wanting to sit on my hands I googled behavioural paediatricians. I found a local Dr and called him to get an appointment. The earliest was July. Ok. So I got a GP referral, not my ordinary GP either as he was on leave at the time, it was another who listened to me and did not dismiss me.

The next time I was in the same building as the paediatricians office, I handed his receptionist the referral letter. I wanted this Dr to know why we were there before we got there. (I highly recommend doing this!) Well the receptionist had a cancellation just before I walked in for the next week and gave it us.

At this stage we did not know why he behaved the way he did. I had not googled his behaviours, but was led to believe we were dealing with a sensory processing issue. But around this time he seemed to have a language regression that was of concern. He was suddenly talking like a seagull. It was driving every one up the wall. Here was this highly intelligent little boy, who has been speaking clearly and in sentences since he was 12 months, suddenly regressing in his speech.

The day of the appointment was kind of like any other day. We had told him of what we were doing and he seemed excited to meet a new Dr. We arrived and played with the toys. The Dr came out of his office and he wanted to go in straight away. For a few minuets the Dr stood by the receptionists desk seemingly talking to the receptionist, but instead he was observing him and his anxiety. By the time we got in the room Thomas was so anxious only his seagull voice came out.

The appointment was LONG Thomas played happily colouring in and occasionally interrupting us to ask crazy little questions. The Dr asked what seemed a billion different questions from birth to now. He listened to our concerns and was patronising. (such a refreshing change from his first pediatrician!)

At the end of the appointment he asked what we knew about Aspergers. Nothing, he asked if there was a family history. And at the time we had to say no. But now we know, there is a HUGE family history.

He then told us Your son has High functioning Aspergers. The moment that changed our life. And not for the bad either.

So this is the story of our diagnosis. We went in thinking he had a server sensory processing disorder. We walked out with a totally different diagnosis. Or is it??